The other night I was sitting with a group of friends- a friend from work, some fellow moms and a friend that has known me for many seasons. As conversation flowed, we found ourselves talking about friendships. And we all noticed the same thing- We were all so grateful of our friends, and that our priorities with friends have shifted. 

I've thought about this several times over the past week and I think it boils down to, we've realized that our resources aren't unlimited and many things in life have shifted- including relationships with our friends. Between work responsibilities, kids' schedules, marriages, extended family, and trying to take care of ourselves somewhere in there- our bandwidth is smaller than it used to be which naturally means we're more thoughtful about where we invest our time. 

Friendships haven't become less important; if anything, they've become more meaningful. But we've learned that we can't pour deeply into everyone. We talked about how beautiful it is that friendships can exist in different lanes.  Work friends make long days lighter. They understand the stress, the inside jokes, the things no one else would fully get. They matter. Mom friends make life smoother and more fun. They share schedules, the carpool chaos, the 'did you know it's spirit week?' reminders. They bring community into the everyday. And then there are the friendships that feel like home. The ones where you don't have to explain yourself. The ones where silence isn't awkward. The ones where honesty is welcomed, not judged. These are the friendships we've learned to protect.

At some point in the conversation, someone said, 'I just don't have the energy to keep up with everything anymore.' And we all nodded. We don't need dozens of close friendships- we need a handful of real ones. We still love meeting new people. We still enjoy connecting at work and through our kids and in our community. We're just being intentional about which ones we walk through more deeply. 

There's something freeing about admitting that your time and emotional capacity are limited. It allows you to show up better for the people you do choose. It allows you to build friendships rooted in mutual effort, honesty, and ease- instead of obligation or comparison. And sitting there that night, listening to everyone share this same gentle shift, I realized something: We're not shrinking our world, we're cultivating it. We're choosing connection that feels reciprocal, welcoming, safe, real and it feels like growth.